Let’s do a bit of “Q&A” action today to start this post off.
QUESTION: Hey Rick, I’m really digging the new relationship report you sent out. But just a quick question. Let’s say she’s not getting up and running out of the movie theater. She’s at the point of saying “We’re just on two completely different wavelengths.”
What do you do with a statement like that, or at least turn it in your favor?
RICK: First of all, I’m glad you’re enjoying the new report.
To answer your question, I’m going to continue the theme of what you should NOT be doing.
As I’ve been saying, learning what not to do is just as important (if not more important) than learning new techniques and whatnot.
And I think this is good because there are plenty of freebie forums and articles where you can scavenge for all the relationship manipulation tactics or techniques as you want.
I’m just don’t like going that route. I think if all you focus on are these external factors, then you really never get any better… you just learn a bunch of little pick-up lines and techniques that never last in the long-run.
You might get the girl initially when she’s had a few drinks, but once you actually reveal your true self when you’re on a date with her? You’ll fail rapidly. I see this happen all the time.
Anyway, what you should NOT do is allow your attitude to shift over to this “I’m really affected by what you said!” behavior
That would be a big no-no.
You see, when you feel like you need to defend yourself and try to change her mind, you’re only going to make things worse.
It’s the wrong attitude to have in this situation.
You’re just going to come off like a sleazy used car salesman trying to weezle your way into the pockets of the customer.
Nobody likes that.
And your partner is especially not going to enjoy that.
It’s only going to solidify in your partner’s mind that you are, in fact, on a completely different wavelength than her.
So don’t fall for the bait.
In the February update of the BPD Relationship Blueprint program, I go over this exact situation.
The update has a brand new Q&A section featuring what to do in this situation and how to correctly pass this test.
There’s also several more questions I answer in detail which I’ll highlight in tomorrow’s email.
The great part about these monthly updates is that you get them all at no extra charge. Unlimited updates for one price.
So if you’ve already bought, then just be on the lookout for the update email coming at you soon.
And if you’re not signed up to receive my daily emails, then do that now because I really think you’ll get value from them.
Like Being Gagged With A Tentacle
I love hearing dating and relationship horror stories. They crack me up.
Today, I happened to hear one of the funniest stories from a friend of mine that I’ve heard in a while.
This girl was telling me the story about her ex-boyfriend.
Specifically about how kissing him was like “being gagged with a tentacle.”
That’s an exact quote, and I loved it so much that I had to steal it from her and use it in these posts (she reads my blog so it’s all good).
There are some things in life that can end up being a deal breaker, no matter how amazing you think you are.
And having a kiss feel like some underwater sea monster is ravaging your throat may be one of those reasons…
It brought back memories of me in high school and college.
I’ve always considered myself a good kisser (hey, you gotta be confident if you want the Attitude).
But there were plenty of things that I was never really great at.
When it comes to relationships and dating and all that, often times your ego gets in the way.
Whether it’s compliments from people in your life, or just straight up fantasy, we tend to be overconfident with ourselves at times.
One of the more common issues you’ll run into is your partner saying how amazing you are in bed.
But then a week later, your partner doesn’t even want to sleep with you.
What’s up with that? Is it all lies?
Well, not necessarily. You’ll have to judge your own unique situation.
But the lesson I want to pass on to you is this:
No matter what compliments you receive in life, be humble about it. Have the attitude that you can always improve, no matter what.
My friend who told me about her tentacle ex never actually told him that he was a bad kisser.
I think this was a mistake because he’s probably still going through life spreading his tentacle (…).
Anyway, stay humble.
Don’t put a lot of weight on words. That’s one of the pillars I teach in my system.
Are BPD Relationships Doomed Forever?
Been getting some nice testimonials from the Blueprint fandom.
Here’s a fist-pumping story that popped in my inbox earlier today:
Thank you for the Blueprint. It’s brilliant and with all of your other emails and articles, it’s assured me that what I’m doing is “right.” I love how you talk about the inclement weather coming – just put on that yellow Poncho and embrace it.
I can smell my boyfriend’s cold treatment coming for days. He asks for space and I give it, but as soon as I’m gone, he’s messaging me, giving me backlash and shiz.
I’m not passive by any means (thanks to your course). I give him the shiz right back and its amazing that when I begin to stand up for myself and give it to him straight, he almost immediately calms down.
We had another conflict the other night, and I wanted to try to make it “right” but I immediately remembered the lessons you teach. After using them, he calmed down, said he was sorry and followed up with loads of kisses.
Thank you for you inspiration!
RICK: You’re welcome, Cherille.
And you’re right, when you take the time to implement the system I teach through the Blueprint, amazing things can happen.
I take great joy in writing the articles and helping out as much as I can. This is my passion. And I intend to do this until I’m old and 6 feet deep.
After all, it’s mostly information that you won’t find in the mainstream relationship industry.
You know, I’ve always looked at myself as sort of an “outsider” if you will.
Someone who just likes to figure things out on his own and do things differently.
I’ve never been good at following rules, and I especially don’t like being around large crowds and doing what everybody else is doing.
It’s just never been my thing.
And it’s probably due to this attitude of mine that I’ve been able to make relationships work with Borderline’s and other ‘crazy’ types.
I turn my head away from all the common crap that’s thrown around on the messageboards and so-called ‘professional blogs’ because I just know it doesn’t work.
It’s almost as if the mainstream industry WANTS you to fail (so you’ll be coming back for more, dependent on them).
Am I accurate about all this?
I honestly do not know.
All I know is that my relationship system works for everyone, men and women, young and old.
And as society continues to fall in line and bow down to the mainstream, my system will continue to be more and more powerful (since it will be more and more rare).
But I’ll be here hammering out daily tips, stories and inspiration for ya.
Keep sending me letters of success, I save and respond to all of them.
If you’re still on the “fence” about the Blueprint and the lives it’s changing, realize that it could be the ‘disrupt’ that your relationship needs.
You can grab the entire package now – and be reading it in the next 2 minutes – right here:
When A Gambler Reveals His Hand
I was reading this article earlier today from a professional gambler and he had this to say:
“It’s not the results you should focus on – it’s the decisions and choices you make. Those are what lead to results.”
This is a guy who gets it.
Even I’m guilty of telling people to focus on results.
But it’s really all about making the right choices and the right decisions when the moment arises.
You get this right, and the results will speak for themselves.
This is why I’m always telling people that the choices you make in your life, whether good or bad, will always lead to a result.
* Chose to go out with friends and throw fireworks at cars?
Stayed the night in county jail.
* Chose to rescue a girl I was dating from a party who drunk dialed at 3:30am?
Broke up with me the next morning.
* Chose to spend years learning a faulty system of dating & relationships?
End up like most people – confused, bitter and frustrated with people.
These are just a few examples I could think of from my own life off the top of my head.
The point is that every choice you make leads to a result.
Bad choices lead to bad results.
Good choices lead to good results.
Simple as that.
Making good choices comes with experience.
If you don’t have that experience, you get out there and crash and burn a bunch of times (story of my life).
Or, you learn from people who have been through the trenches.
You read books (especially non-fiction).
You go to seminars and learn from speakers you respect.
You listen to podcasts and radio shows.
You travel and explore the world around you or overseas – whatever you choose.
Either way, real knowledge isn’t found in the textbooks.
When you graduate, you have a commencement ceremony.
Commencement means a beginning, a new start.
Most people think graduating college means you just get a new job and stabilize your life.
This couldn’t be further from the truth.
You’re basically starting from level 0 when you graduate.
It’s from this point that you can begin to grow your mind and experience the real world.
Unfortunately, most people don’t do this. They get their 9 to 5 job and get comfortable.
Such a shame.
It’s no surprise that most people who find their own success in life do it without getting a degree.
You learn how the real world works and you build your knowledge from people who have been through the trenches.
When it comes to the crazy, emotionally-driven relationships, these are what I’ve spent thousands of hours to master.
You won’t learn this stuff in school.
Therapists and psychologists certainly don’t know what really works these days.
So that’ll do it for this post. If you haven’t yet grabbed my free eBook, then I highly recommend you do that now. Plus, you’ll get my daily emails of tips and advice for relationships, BPD and much more.