Wondering why the girl you’re dating is playing hard to get? Read this article to find out what you should do.
One of the more annoying experiences of dating a girl is when she decides to play hard to get.
Or, it at least feels that way.
She’s giving you less attention, she isn’t responding to calls or texts, she doesn’t seem to talk as much as she used to, she isn’t sleeping with you as much, etc.
Why does she behave this way? Does she no longer have feelings for you? Has she met another guy?
These are just some of the questions that are undoubtedly running through your head right now.
Well, here’s the thing:
I don’t really believe in the whole “hard to get” concept. Why you may ask?
Because in all of my years working with thousands of men and women, not once has I ever seen a woman “play hard to get” with a man that she was truly attracted to.
The women that seem to play these games are the women who have lost interest in the guy.
She’s either not totally sold on the guy, or she currently has several other men gunning for her attention.
If she’s an attractive women, then this is 100% the case — you’ve got to be more attractive than all of the other guy’s going for her. That’s just the way it is.
Work On Your Overall Attractiveness
At the end of the day, the core issue that most men have is that they become less attractive to the woman over a period of time. Sometimes you lose attraction quickly, other times you lose it slowly.
Some guys will be extremely attractive to a woman at the beginning of a first date. But by the time the date ends, she can’t stand him. His behavior and words he has said has completely turned her off.
One of the best ways to build your attraction in a woman’s eye is to be more of a challenge.
What exactly do I mean when I say that you need to be a challenge to women?
This doesn’t mean you turn into some asshole. A lot of men do this and it backfires spectacularly.
Don’t do that!
What I mean by this is that you develop your self-worth and self-respect. As a result, this ultimately will rid you of any codependency you may have.
Codependency is a fancy word for needy behavior. Men who are needy always struggle in relationships.
This is due to the fact that you never stand up for yourself. You never challenge the woman. She knows that she owns your balls.
That’s not that attractive to a woman. She wants a man, not some wimp that she can boss around 24/7.
If you aren’t a man who values himself, you are communicating that you don’t carry much confidence and self-respect.
This is exactly what causes women to pull away and play “hard to get” with you (even though she’s being extremely easy for the other guy in her life).
Women naturally desire men that have respect for themselves. You naturally become a challenge to women because when you respect yourself, you don’t give in to these wild games that women seem to play.
However, after dating crazy women over and over again, I am a firm believer that most women don’t purposely play hard to get.
This ‘game playing’ and ‘hard to get’ action that you run into with women is usually a response or a reaction to something that you are doing, whether you’re aware of it or not.
This is why your understanding of attraction is a necessary skill to have. You must educate yourself on this topic.
No, the seduction blogs on the internet won’t teach you much. Neither will Reddit. So avoid those locations or you’ll just fill your brain with conflicting information.
To help you build your awareness into god-like levels, I’ve written a free mini-guide that’s all about the #1 mistake that causes your lover’s to despise you and ultimately leave you.
Got the guide? I’ll send it to your inbox. Check it out after you go through this article because it’s very important. I will skyrocket your success in with women and relationships in general.
Anyway, the purpose of this website is to teach YOU awareness and what to look for. You’ll stumble a few times along the way, but you will learn much quicker than all of the other guys out there.
Why Do Girls Play Hard To Get?
Most men never put themselves in the shoes of women. You don’t realize the kinds of shitty men that have come into her life. Most women I know who are “crazy” have had a sociopath boyfriend in the past.
As a result, she is extremely cautious when it comes to dating and relationships. She will test you, get triggered by certain behaviors, and generally be a pain in the butt at times.
But, simply knowing this fact about women, you’ll be ready to deal with it because you know where she’s coming from. This is why I enjoy talking to women about their previous relationships on dates. She is literally giving you insight into her love life. Powerful!
Many men think that women are simply being manipulative and playing games on purpose. While that may be true at times, a lot of behavior can also be subconscious.
Women can change their feelings for you every 5 minutes. One moment she loves being around you, the next she wants you to give her some space.
There’s nothing wrong with letting your girl come to you. In fact, highly confident, successful men value their independence and are the ones who get pursued.
You need to be the opposite of the Nice Guy that mom taught you when you were a child. The sooner you stop taking dating advice from women, the sooner you’ll start getting more dates.
Start with developing control over your emotions. Stop being so sensitive to the words you hear. Don’t be needy because you’re not getting enough attention.
Relationships can wait. Don’t chase women.
If you want to have successful relationships with women and keep her from playing hard to get, you need the emotional fortitude of James Bond. This is emotional strength at its core.
I have helped a lot of men through their relationships with highly emotional, BPD-type women. The ones who succeed are the ones who take action with what I tell them.
The ones that fail are the sensitive guys who are high on their morals and really unaware of what goes on in these women’s heads.
If you struggle to get past the early dating stage with any woman, then you need to do more research and take more action. The more experience you gain with women, the better you’ll get at this stuff. It doesn’t come natural for most of us.
Do girls really play hard to get on purpose?
Yes. And no.
You need to be able to back off and let her come to you. Don’t keep texting or calling if you don’t hear from her. Get comfortable with the vacuum of silence.
Women Are Not Logical When It Comes To Relationships
Another reason is that women are emotional! You really need to engrave this fact into your head. Where men might be 90% logical, I simply see women as 90% emotional (even if they’re not).
When you learn how to communicate with women on an emotional level, your entire dating and relationship life will change almost instantaneous.
The stuff I’m teaching you here ties into my post about when a girl pushes me away. Most guys make the mistake of listening to a woman’s logical words.
Women say a lot of things that simply don’t make sense.
If you get in the habit of believing their words, you’re going to constantly be disappointed since women tend to do the opposite of what they say.
They are emotionally driven, not logical like men. She could say she loves you, but be texting another guy in 5 minutes. That’s just how they are.
Women only respond to the way they currently feel. A lot of men are this way, too!
This is why those guys that you see with all the money and expensive cars and houses and everything struggle with women as well.
Sure, they may have the hot gold-digger or sugar baby, but it’s a surface-level relationship. The girl is usually fucking other guys on the side.
I know several “sugar babies” and they are always sleeping with some average dude on the side when they’re not with their rich “boyfriend.”
This is why you need to learn how to be a man that gives a girl good feelings if you ever wish to keep a woman in your life long-term.
If you’re dating a woman with BPD, her emotions will be much more erratic and chaotic than a “normal” woman. Therefore, you must be the strongest rock in her life or she will leave you for someone else.
It’s what she expects from you, and it’s why she tests you all the time with these games. She wants to see how you react.
If you can successfully date someone with BPD, you’re most definitely a high quality individual with thick skin. Give yourself credit and be confident in your ability.
So if you think your girl is pushing you away, you need to take a step back and ask yourself WHY she’s acting this way towards you. It’s important to never forget that actions speak louder than words.
When a girl is getting emotional and saying these towards me that would make every other guy freak out and react in the wrong way, I instead do the right thing – I realize that her emotions are boiling over and she simply needs me to remind her that I’m strong and firm and not going to fall over like every other guy.
That is truly why women get dramatic.
So if she’s pushing you away, somewhere earlier you reacted incorrectly to her emotions and now you’re in a hole. Maybe you’re just simply too available. Do you think men that have options and are busy working on themselves are always available? Hell no!
So make the changes you need to make today and I promise you’ll never think about ‘games’ or ‘hard to get’ or ‘manipulation’.
And make sure you’re on my (almost) daily email newsletter. I’ll send you a free guide full of BPD relationship tips just for signing up.
What’s your experience with women playing hard to get? Share your story in the comments below.
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