Originally written by Shark on May 8, 2011:
It’s no surprise that beta males are like crabs in a barrel — misery, complacency, and sexual dementia have an uncanny taste for company.
As soon as you start trying to make positive changes to yourself, the people around you will react in one of 2 ways:
A) If they like the change they will accommodate it and comment on how you have “matured” or “see the light”
B) If they don’t like the change, if the change conflicts with their own selfinterests, or if they would simply prefer if you stayed on the same boat as them (most AFCs) they will resent it and immediately resort to their “JustBeYourself” platitudes.
In other words, if your friends are AFCs and you try and reverse the virgin aura currently omnipresent in your semblance of self, there is a 90% chance they will attempt to tear down your efforts by saying shit like “Stop trying so hard” or “Stop trying to be someone you’re not.”
Women will use the same technique to subdue any type of behavior that violates their feminine imperative. “Shaming” is possibly the most ancient and effective female social convention to date.
Fortunately I am here tell you that you need to ignore your diseased AFC friends who whisper virgin lullabies into your ears, masticate the spreading torrent of feminism around you, and numb yourself to the subcommunication constantly being marketed to you by the Matrix.
Men have been too complacent with their own sterilization and too quite about the everincreasing vilification of masculinity. Even a brontosaurus would drown in all the bullshit covering the surface of our perceptions. The next time ANYONE tries to hold you back from being a better person, whether it’s your friends who tell you “fuck doing work” or your girlfriend who tells you “stop trying to be all masculine,” shove a chiwawa up their ass and make a mental note to ignore them more often.
On a side note — remember that change must be SUBTLE, it must be INTERNAL. If you try and “force” your dominance on others or try and extract their approval by wildly swinging the sword of “Alphaness,” you’re just another prick trying to qualify himself for attention. Women are professionally trained in the art of exploiting OVERT masculine behavior. Remember — SUBTLE power is key.
This is one of those “short and sweet” Shark articles, which there are plenty of. As I’ve said before, Shark is very good at giving you the hard truths in as little words as possible.
That’s one of the reasons why I enjoyed learning from him back in the day. Shark is one of many people I learned from back when I was clueless about how to be an attractive man.
But, his audience is niche. He doesn’t appeal to the average man looking for dating advice. He thinks much bigger than everybody else in the “PUA” world. While everybody else is trying to teach the “get rich quick” type of scheme, Shark is out here teaching you how to be successful for the rest of your life.
And he never sold a single product until much later when he finally wrote one book. No expensive courses, no coaching, nothing like that. Just a single book. He did all of this out of passion. It was his purpose and mission at the time.
A man is only as strong as his purpose. Without purpose, you will slip into that “beta male” role Shark often talks about. It’s hard to be a leader and a forward-moving individual when you don’t have a mission you’re pursuing in life.
The truth is that most men these days are miserable with a terrible sex life. I think this is because most men these days have no purpose. They feel stuck in a rut and don’t know how to escape the monotony.
Shark is a much better writer than I am. I almost spat out my coffee reading that paragraph about how your virgin friends are whispering lullabies in your ear. He’s a hilarious writer able to get his message across so smoothly.
And it’s true: the people around you, especially loved ones, will give you shit for trying to change yourself for the better. They’ll make fun of you, tell you to stop, shame you, try to make you feel stupid, and so on.
I still get this shit from family members to this day.
It’s unbelievable as I’ve been who I am for over 10 years now. And yet, people in my family STILL give me shit for my lifestyle. Whether it’s my fashion choices, or the traveling I do, how I don’t do traditional relationships anymore, the foods I eat, the self-employed life, and on and on.
It doesn’t matter what I do.
As long as what I’m doing is different from their shitty lifestyle, they will make fun of me for it.
And that is really the big lesson here. No matter what you do in your life, people will give you shit for it if it’s outside their small-minded view. You can’t let these people get to you.
As Shark says, shove a dog up their asshole. Make a note to yourself to ignore them more often. I only associate with certain family members when I have to: annual events, holidays, trips, etc. That’s it.
And if your girlfriend is trying to change you and make you “better?” You should actually be ignoring her advice as well. You might think she’s trying to make you a better person, but believe me when I say that she’ll just end up leaving you the more you conform to her ways.