Reader Comments:
“Hey Shark, on the topic of punishing your girlfriend for acting bitchy, where is the line drawn between a just accusation and complaining/attention-seeking?”
You should never “accuse” or “complain” at all. Both would be taking a far too engaged approach. To keep your girlfriend’s heart constantly fluttering for you, you have to stay in a perpetual state of amused mastery, not noxious anxiety.
You take nothing she does seriously, and if she starts acting out of hand then you simply withdraw attention because you have better things to do than absorb blows of insolence from a woman (I don’t mean that in a sexist way, but ALWAYS remember that women are ONLY compliments to your life – your life must never revolve around them).
If she continues in her endeavors to join the league of extraordinary cunts, then you cut your losses and move on.
In terms of determining whether she’s actually doing something wrong or just acting like a normal female commonly possessed by vagina demons from the shadow realm, you have to use your own judgment. Unless I know the specific circumstances, I honestly wouldn’t be able to tell you (Unlike other relationship “experts,” I don’t pretend to have all the answers).
However, in my experience it always helps to ask this question to yourself:
“What would James Bond do?”
As stupid as it sounds, it works remarkably well. Any time you are in doubt of what to do because you don’t know where to draw the line, just ask yourself what a Super Alpha would do.
What’s far more important than drawing an accurate distinction between stuff you should actually care about and stuff you shouldn’t give a shit about is HOW YOU GO ABOUT HANDLING disrespect.
Alpha’s aren’t immune to jealousy, but they don’t prostrate or bitch about it. They handle it efficiently.
Why Arguing Is A Waste Of Time
Short and sweet article from Shark. I’ll continue with my thoughts on the matter which line up almost exactly with his.
I’ve been talking about fighting in relationships for years, especially considering my background is from dating only women with BPD. Due to many reasons, these are the types of women I tend to attract. To this day, I’m still in a relationship with a borderline woman.
And, here’s the truth:
Fighting and arguing is a complete waste of time. In the 14 months I’ve been dating my girlfriend, we have never had a serious fight. We have never had a disagreement or a toxic situation that lasted more than 15 minutes. Why?
Because I’ve always stopped myself from letting it get to that point. When it comes to my girlfriend, she cools off after about 15 minutes. She wants to cuddle and have sex to make things feel better.
Most guys make the mistake of trying to prove that they’re right and she’s wrong. The assholes will try to put her in her place. The nice guys have no idea what it means to give her some space.
Like Shark said above, men who understand women don’t prostrate or complain about the situation. They diffuse the situations and get things back to a state of healthy enjoyment.
If I was to get angry and bitch at my girlfriend every time she gets emotional, it would only make her more mad and virtually guarantee her leaving me for good. Her legs would close up even tighter and she probably wouldn’t sleep with me for the rest of the day. She might just get up and leave.
But because I understand these relationships, that has yet to happen. She never gives me that hot/cold treatment because I handle the situations correctly.
As a man dating BPD women, you must learn to walk away. This doesn’t mean ending the relationship. It simply means not escalating her emotions when she’s in a state of extreme sensitivity.
Giving her space to breathe and doing your own thing (which you should be doing 90% of the time) is all you need to do. Let her come to you and she will be jumping on your lap in no time.
– Rick
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