Reignite The Fire

Finding Success in BPD and Codependent Relationships

The Legacy of Shark

Many years ago, there was a great blog on the internet written by a man who called himself "Shark." Most of you reading this have never heard of this man or his website.

But, it was easily one of the best blogs that ever existed on the internet and I was very sad when the website finally shut down round 4 years ago.

Shark focused his writings around women and relationships. His website was called "Solve My Girl Problems" for a reason. However, what he taught was much bigger than that.

It was a true treasure trove of truth. The men and women who were lucky enough to stumble across his blog would be forever changed as they continued to read what he wrote.

I managed to find an archive of every single blog post he ever wrote. I can't with good conscious let what he wrote fade away into nothingness.

Therefore, I will be posting his best articles here on my website along with additional comments and insights from myself.

Below you will find these articles. I hope you enjoy them in all their glory.

Getting Over An Ex Girlfriend? Sleep With Someone Else.

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Shark gives us a quick lesson here in this article. Short and sweet, just like many of his posts:

I have dealt with the most severe breakups known to man kind. I have seen men left suicidal, broken, and utterly destroyed. And through it all, I have noticed that the reason for their bottomless sense of grief was not at all what they thought it was, or what they paraded around about.

Following a breakup men have told me “she was my soul mate,” “I loved her more than anything,” “We were supposed to get married,” yada yada yada. In other words, that they were upset because of a cosmic sense of love and belonging that they had lost. [Read more…]

The Truth About Cold Approaching Women In Bars, Coffee Shops, Etc.

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There are plenty of good lessons written by Shark in this post IF you believe in the power of Cold Approaching.

But, as you’ll read in my follow-up that follows the post by Shark, you will see why I fundamentally disagree with the idea of Cold Approaching.

Shark received a question from a reader wanting help on cold approaching women. Here is the long, detailed, powerful answer that he gave to him that many other “gurus” would charge money for:

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The Traits of Being A Successful Man and Having Healthy Relationships

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Pervading the life­ coaching scene are certain beaten to death concepts that are understood only in theory. I’ve written before on the various common traits and habits of self-­made men: persistence, an intense dedication to self-­education, a god complex, and a surfeit of psychosexual energy to name a few.

But a question posed by a recent colleague of mine made me realize how little the more abstract concepts are understood. He asked me to name some of the distinct characteristics I saw in men of ambition, but more importantly, asked me to DEFINE them in a clear manner. The latter part I had trouble with, but eventually after a bit of thinking I figured out a reasonable way to do so. I hope to express that same clarity in this post, and perhaps give you a more transparent understanding of said concepts.

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My Girlfriend’s Best Friend Is A Guy. Should I Dump Her?

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If it bothers you, Dump Her.

Before going on to explain why such a trivial complication should be resolved in such an extreme and abrupt manner, we need to explore the idea of “cutting losses” and why it’s such an extensively circulated solution among the dating community.

Almost 90% of the time you have a problem with a girl, the immediate solution offered by any seasoned Don Juan will be “break up with her.” It’s not because we’re all unemotional cyborgs, the answer has more to do with efficiency.

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What’s The Best Way To Make New Friends?

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Originally written by Shark on April 17, 2012

A question comes in:

Some other reader asked about making friends, could you please do a post on this? Your book mentions the skills necessary to AMOG them, but what about to make them? I’ve read through all your past posts, and gathered that practicing social skills is a necessary aspect, but could you give some insight on the friendship dynamic itself possibly?

Friendship is an evolved concept, developing primarily because social codependency increases our chances for survival. If it did not, there would be no herding phenomena, nor a clique/pack mentality. In fact, an interesting book I once read (Death From A Distance by Paul Bingham) correlates human cooperation directly with the development of efficient methods to control conflict through coercion.

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How to Build a Meaningful and Successful Relationship

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A reader comments:

“So Shark, what if you’re not necessarily looking for sex, but just a meaningful relationship? Sex could be an option later in the relationship, but I just want to focus building rapport and attraction. All of these articles seem to focus on the pussy rather than the relationship.”

Building a meaningful relationship in a world filled with feminazi propaganda and women who have had their egos bloated to legendary proportions via facebook/instagram fawning is almost an absurd goal.

[Read more…]

Should You Cut Off Your Girlfriend And Go No Contact?

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Originally written by Shark on March 16, 2012

I got the idea for this post after reading someone’s thread on a pick up artist forum regarding soft nexts to handle drama in relationships — an idea I wholly support. I noticed that right after, people were immediately pointing out the issue of “communicating” with your girlfriend, a very misleading and instinctively beta response.

Most people on this site would agree that the majority of relationship advice being circulated in the mainstream is highly feminized, to the point of blurring the line between what is “good” and “bad” in a relationship, and insidiously aimed at upholding the feminine imperative. To illustrate:

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