While I know my women readers will enjoy this article, I really want my male readers to take notes, lol.
I’m going to be offering you men some awesome information on what women deep down want in a man. With all the distractions out there, it’s important that we take some time to look at what really works.
If you’ve been following me and reading my blog for awhile, you should know that I’m a realist. I ignore all the common, saturated information out there and instead learn everything on my own through experience.
As for all the loyal women that read my blog, thank you. I hope you enjoy this article and that you remain confident that there are men out there who get you. I know it can seem rare ;)
1. He Doesn’t Make You His World
Let’s start things off with a bang, shall we? Good.
The first big thing I want you men to understand is that while women may just say they want a guy that gives her his all, she also really wants you to have your own life.
All too often, men make the awful mistake of making the girl in his life his #1 priority. It might sound cute in poems and all, but understand that women want to support you and your goals.
She wants to be by your side as you take on the world and move forward like a true leader. It’s a pretty big turn on for a woman to look at you and see you as this man that’s focused and on his journey to be the best he can be.
Men make the big mistake of forgetting who they are and what their long-term plan is. They get comfortable in this average, common lifestyle and the relationship gets dull.
These types of relationships just don’t last in this day and age. Women are now able to match us men on every level and if you’re not willing to step up and consistently move forward, she’s going to get turned off.
A lot of relationships start out great, you got that honeymoon period (which I always teach you to try to avoid), you got that beginning high together.
Well, a lot of times this high fades because she loses interest once your hype fades. We live in the Information Age and it’s rapidly becoming a hook up culture due to the easy access to information.
It’s kind of advanced, but you need to understand that women aren’t these small, weak individuals like they’ve always been portrayed. They don’t need you to provide for them. It ain’t the 90’s anymore.
What women need is a man that actually understand what they need, lol. What they don’t want is a man that’s still living in the old ways. She might sleep with you, but once she figures you out (which is pretty damn quick), she’s turned off.
2. He Thinks Beyond Sex
Ahh, the other big failure of man. Sex is great, sex is fun, but sex isn’t a big deal. If your relationship has no sex, then it’s most likely you’re desperately wanting it.
And as a man, I understand – sex is great like I said. It can be a lot of fun when you’re with a woman that doesn’t hold back and likes to be into it just like you.
But women also know that sex is easy. They know that all they have to do is post a picture of them looking cute on Instagram and they’ll instantly get dozens if not hundreds of men thirsting over her body.
In this day and age, sex for a woman isn’t going to make or break a relationship. In fact, due to the giant thirst level of men these days, she knows she can use sex as a move for power.
This is advanced stuff, but for all you men getting overly attached to a woman due to how great she is in bed, you guys are just falling victim to your thirst.
Now don’t get me wrong here – women absolutely love a man that can be great in bed. But I’ve yet to meet a woman these days that will stay with a man just because he’s good in bed. The only type of woman that would do that is a woman that has absolutely nothing going for her.
So for my fellow men out there – the more importance you place on sex, the more you’re submitting your worth as a man. She’s not setting you up for a trap. She just knows that if you’re easy, then you’re easy. What good is that?
There’s nothing wrong with being great in bed and enjoying pleasurable experiences with women. I love this stuff. But there is so much more that goes into a relationship outside of the bedroom.
Get this part handled before you worry about how long you can last. Because you won’t be getting anything when she leaves you for another man that’s simply understands women better than you.
3. He Knows How To Actually Communicate
Now that I’ve discussed the most important qualities in men, I’ll get into more of the smaller, yet still important ones such as communication.
Obviously it’s easy to say that communication is most important. But communication is a part of everything. Simply understanding what a woman actually wants in a man is a way of communication.
Communication is much more than words. That’s the point I want to get across here. Too many men fall victim to words and it really causes mass hysteria.
I get so many emails from men that are angry and confused because their woman told him how she loves him, yet goes and runs off with another guy a couple of days later.
I’m not saying that it’s okay for a woman to do that to you – but guys, c’mon. It’s 2015 and it’s time to finally understand that words hold little weight. They’re just air.
Words only affect those that allow them to be affected. It’s very easy to accuse a woman of being manipulative when you listen to everything she says. But who’s the one that ends up hurt in the end? The man that listened so damn well.
The reason why I hammer this rule into men all the time is because you’re actually playing a role in her ‘not so honest’ words. It’s really all out of fear. Both men and women are massive victims to fear and you need to understand this.
When you’re a weak man that puts a lot of weight on words, you’re instilling fear in your woman that she can’t be her true, honest self with you. Instead of hurting you with the truth, it’s a lot easier to say things to keep you happy.
As hard as you may find it to believe, women don’t want to hurt you. It’s the last thing she wants to do. So out of fear, she’s going to tell you things to keep you from being hurt. She fears what the truth will do to you.
I’m not saying it’s right, but it is what it is. Understand that men do this as well to women. Have you never told a woman that you like her just so you can sleep with her? Most men are guilty of this. And it ain’t right.
But it happens to both men and women. This is why it’s really important to pay attention to actions and see beyond the words. Have a sharper eye. Don’t be like everybody else taking words to face value.
No successful businessman or woman would be where they are today if they just listened to everybody and did what they were told or heard and read in a Forbes magazine.
And there’s nothing more attractive than a man that understands this, a man who sees beyond all the empty words and understands what she’s really feeling. It’s a very rare quality these days and it’s why a lot of my training revolves around teaching you how to look deeper and see things differently.
4. He Loves How You Look On The Couch
Getting into more micro stuff here, you can really make your woman happy and comfortable with you when you like and appreciate how she is when she’s lounging around in sweatpants.
Or leggings. Leggings are better. But the point is that you really get to know who your woman is when it’s just you two hanging out on the couch in house clothes enjoying each other.
My favorite experiences with women are hanging out on the couch, under a blanket just enjoying a movie or tv show. Going out and dressing up is fun and all, but there’s really nothing like just lounging out together and seeing her real beauty.
Now this doesn’t mean I want you men to constantly lounge on the couch with her, lol. Think of it more as what you do after a long day of pursuing your hobbies and doing your daily grind.
I’m not a fan of the idea of ‘closeness’. In fact, I teach people to not try to be ‘close’ with their partners. It’s a form of neediness always trying to be close.
Instead, I want you to see this as more of a ‘Hey babe, yeah it’s been a long but very productive week. I really just want to chill out here and enjoy some time with you. And bake some chocolate chip cookies.’
It’s NOT a ‘Hey I’m bored, let’s hang out tonight. And tomorrow night. And the next night.’ attitude.
5. He Enjoys The Smaller, Finer Details
I sat here for a few minutes thinking of a good way to describe this. What I came up with this is this. Let me know if you think it’s good:
When a woman takes a picture of herself looking all cute and sexy, most men will thirst over her body. What they want is her body. They don’t know, or care, about anything else.
A quality man on the other hand won’t really take a second look. Yeah, he’ll acknowledge in his head that she’s cute, but he wonders what else there is beyond all the skin.
He sees her in the photograph but he’s also curious about her surroundings. He notices the trees in the background, the buildings, the city lights. He’s more curious about where you actually are and what you’re doing than what you’re wearing.
In other words, he’s not your typical, basic male. He’s got a deeper taste for things. He spends time every day enriching his mind and he knows there’s a lot more to a woman than just her skin.
He knows that the details in life are what win. He knows that nothing worth having comes easy and so he works on learning all these details and knowledge and skills and what not to be at that next level.
It’s really a form of communication as well. Is it any wonder than women who model for a living end up with guys that usually have no interest in that stuff? Models are constantly creeped out by their photographers because they’re usually men that are doing it to get close to these women, lol.
Men enjoy these smaller, more tasteful things in life because they know it enriches their mind. And women like men that have more depth than the others.
I really think that one of the best things a man can do for himself is to constantly be expanding his world and enriching his mind. I really believe it’s the best form of attractiveness.
6. He Picks His Battles Wisely
Oh you silly men, how often I want to grab you by the tie and smack you across the face. Why oh why do you continue to feed into petty arguments and fights?
As a form of communication, a man knows when to fight fire with fire and when to simply brush it off because it’s not something worth arguing about.
Guys – understand that when you’re investing into a fight, you’re going to be bringing your emotions into this. The more petty the fight you get yourself into, the more your true colors will shine.
It’s very easy for a woman to write you off and dump you when you show your true emotional colors. The easiest way for a woman to test you is to bait you into a small, petty fight.
It’s really easy for men that understand this and have gain control over your emotions to pass these tests with flying colors. You need to understand that women have had different experiences in their lives than you.
Simply put, women need to test men for their strength. She wants to see if you’re going to emotionally react, retreat and be pushed around, fight her back with logic, defend yourself, fight fire with fire, or brush it off because it’s not important.
I’m sure there’s more reasons I’m not thinking about, but either way you need to understand that women must test you for your strength. The stronger the woman, the more she’ll test.
A lot of men complain about BPD’s being crazy and such, always confusing them. But in my experience, women with BPD are pretty damn strong. They’ve been through some harsh experiences and they therefore test you hard because they’ve been hurt in the past.
A lot of men fail these tests early on and then end up getting burned later. She’s usually turned off completely before you even realize it. As I always say, it takes a certain type of man to succeed in BPD relationships.
7. He Knows How To Have Fun
And last but not least is the fun factor. Who doesn’t like a man that knows how to have fun?
Now this doesn’t necessarily mean you’re funny – it means that you know how to have fun. Jokesters, goofballs, clowns aren’t normally terms of attractiveness women use for men.
Instead, you want to hear things like ‘Oh he just always knows how to have a good time’ or ‘I just always feel good around him’ or ‘He’s just so fun to be with’ or ‘He just always makes me smile, I always have butterflies in my stomach’.
Those are some examples I could think of off the top of my head.
When you have a woman describing you this way, you’re basically passing the fun test.
One of the biggest reasons for my success in relationships is due to the fact that the women I date always say these things about me.
What they usually don’t know is that I work really hard to be cultured and knowledgeable.
The reason this is important is because when you make it a habit to be this way, you will always be looking for new things.
And discovering new things is always fun.
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